2nd Chances..and crazy people

Greetings to all. Most of you are family. Sometimes when you are a lowly political figure you are asked to attend functions. Most of the people there were family, and the person who invited me was my mother.... ABATE's Palmetto Chapter, of which I am a member, held a "Fall Ball" rally to celebrate brotherhood. ABATE is the American Brotherhood Against Totalitarian Endeavors, a Motorcycle Rights Wright's Organization. At any rate. There was a band at this fete and they were playing a slow song and I couldn't help but notice all the couples dancing. Many of them their 2nd or 3rd marriage it made me think about 2nd chances and marriage. As an unmarried woman of 28 who has no intention of getting married (that's the crazy people part) anytime soon, I sometimes wonder about people who do, and what happens when it's over. I know many of my divorced girlfriends and even single friends who have gone through breakups. They are horrible and personal, and sometimes can take away your ability to love and trust another human being? As a student of new wave psychoselfish thinking, people can only do to you what you let them do to you? If someone hurts you it's your own fault for letting them in? Now that I don't believe, if you love someone then you love them. But when is enough enough? And when it's over how do you know when to pick up and start over again? Makes me think of couples I know who have been married for 40+ years most only knew each other for a few months before getting married. Now we have 5 million couples living together unwed, and most couples POSSLQ don't even get married after living together? Interested in divorce facts I looked some up.

Percentage of population that is married:
59% (down from 62% in 1990, 72% in 1970)
Percentage of population that has never married:
24%
Percentage of population that is divorced:
10% (up from 8% in 1990, 6% in 1980)
Percentage of population that is widowed:
7%
Median age at first marriage:
Males: 26.9Females: 25.3
Median age at first divorce:
Males: 30.5Females: 29
Median age at second marriage:
Males: 34Females: 32
Median age at second divorce:
Males: 39.3Females: 37
Median duration of first marriages that end in divorce:
Males: 7.8 yearsFemales: 7.9 years
Median duration of second marriages that end in divorce:
Males: 7.3 yearsFemales: 6.8 years
Median number of years people wait to remarry after their first divorce:
Males: 3.3 yearsFemales: 3.1 years
Percentage of married people who reach their 5th, 10th, and 15th anniversaries:
5th: 82%10th: 65%15th: 52%
Percentage of married people who reach their 25th, 35th, and 50th anniversaries:
25th: 33%35th: 20%50th: 5%
Percentage of people who have ever been married by the age of 25:
Males: 32%Females: 50%
Percentage of people who have ever been married by the age of 35:
Males: 77%Females: 84%
Percentage of people who have ever been married by the age of 45:
Males: 87%Females: 90%
Percentage of people who have ever been married by the age of 55:
Both males and females: 95%
Number of unmarried couples living together:
5.5 million
Percentage of unmarried couples living together that are male-female unions:
89%

50% of females have been married by the age of 25, well I missed that mark but the age of 45 is 90%, whew.. Looks like I will get there, unless I am part of that 10%. The remarriage divorce rate seems to be more, but at least they took the leap, and it seems that men wait longer to get married and remarried. Enough stats lets look at the emotional side of things. I watched these couples dance, I knew everyone of them and their stories. Some of them absolutely touching, others stories of convenience. Is convenience companionship? In first marriages I often wonder how much of it is actual love, or is it, "hey we've been together for a year, it's time? My friends are looking?" My brother and his wife were together for 3 years before they got engaged, I remember Elizabeth being restless, but not because of societal expectations, because she loved him and was getting nervous. As anyone would. These couples were holding each other, looking into the eyes of their partner, I could not help feel lucky to witness so much love and feeling in a small room, it made me blush. They twirled about the room, cheek to cheek, swaying, turning and enjoying the music. I wasn't envious of what they had though, I preferred to watch it. To watch peoples wishes coming true. People who wished for a 2nd chance, to end a first marriage, have children, but most importantly for a second dance.